106

Im A Drug Dealer EH

Posted August 17th, 2007 by Jeremy Schoemaker

(sorry comments got deleted on this post) feel free to re comment

So found out a couple nights ago that my neighbors across the street are telling other people in town that I am a drug dealer… nice…

Evidently the quote was “He never leaves the house unless he travels around the country for days at a time, we think he deals drugs late at night out of his black hummer” and “They have UPS dropping off new computers and stuff at there house every day”.

We do have boxes coming from ups/fedex every day but thats because of my Amazon addiction and the fact I am a sucker for those deals of the day gold box specials.

Here is the thing my neighbors are Indian and have huge ass group prayer meetings all the time. So do I go around and tell everyone they are a terrorist cell? No cause I know Indians and I know not all are terrorists. In fact I am a frequent sponsor of the India SEO Meetings and hope to make it down there someday.

So why does a white guy with a black h2 with nice wheels have to be a drug dealer?

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106 comments. What say you?

  1. Good Comment?
    DRAWBOBO

    damn dude! they r all jst jealous. cant deal with the facts that ur actually making money on the net. i wish one day the people on my hood would care to talk abt me. ;(

  2. Good Comment?
    krillz

    It’s called envy :P

  3. Good Comment?
    Gecko Tales

    Hell, send them pot in the mail and then call the cops on them.

  4. Good Comment?
    Grivon

    “I don’t care what you heard about me… :P

  5. Good Comment?
    Grivon

    Wowwwwww – I had a feeling this post would be a hot one – 100 comments and counting… AND you’ve already lost most of the original comments to the best of my knowledge?!?

    That’s just incredible shoe – I can’t imagine someone who DOESN’T have anything to hide actually being accused of something like that – I mean you sure as hell don’t fit the look of the typical drug dealer… not the ones I buy off anyways ;)

    They’re just jealous of your cashflow dude – maybe make a donation to their “mosque” like the godfather did the church.. that’ll REALLY scare ‘em :p

  6. Good Comment?
    STUART Hannig

    Would suck if the law finds this rumor out.

  7. Good Comment?
    shay

    ok also i doubt this has ANYTHING to do with the color of your skin, obviously you needed an scapegoat and picked them being indian as the perfect one, there just suspicious as to what you do, and its not because of your skin color

  8. Good Comment?
    akshay

    ok me being indian, ya all the lower class indians have this stupid mentality, thinking oh if your not a doctor or a professor — you cant be making money. now i dont know how you related indian to terrorists though, i guess because they have brown skin too? or maybe its because there muslims? but anyway, if you go up to them and bring it up ..they will be scared shit less and shut up. though i admit indian people do talk alot of shit, espeically the fresh ones…and i bet its mostly the wife doing it too. sigh…

  9. Good Comment?
    Don@AffiliateWatcher

    I can see it now…Shoe cruzin’ in the H2 late at night, pulling up to a bunch of geeks standing on the corner. The window rolls down just a little and a voice sez “Psssst…Yo, wasup beeches…Cmere…wanna score some mysql databases? How about some one way links fo yo blogs? Yeah man, I can set yuz up. Ima yo man”

  10. Good Comment?
    jim

    it’s more interesting to talk about a drug dealer than an internet nerd :)

  11. Good Comment?
    stupid 3gp

    lolx thats pretty funny. Different People different Views. For me it is hard to make people understand that i make money online. I just tell them i do development and designing do projects to help them digest otherwise i think they wont understand ever in their life.

  12. Good Comment?
    John Loch

    Sheeit (fun with the neighbours) !

    Stay in bed for a week, hang 20 pairs of panties on the line, and leave a few empty rubber boxes on top of the wheelie bin.

    You’ll be the neighbourhood ho before you know it !

    :)

  13. Good Comment?
    Angela

    Wow, crazy. Maybe they should google people before accusing them of being drug dealers ;)

  14. Good Comment?
    Knuckles10

    You should dress up like gangstas with some friends and put another friend in a large bag. During a time your neighbours would be watching, screech up your driveway with your hummer, all of you get out of the car quickly, get the “body in the bag” and drag it inside.

    Then look out the Windows to see their reactions.

  15. Good Comment?
    nitin

    :) I live in India and indeed my neighbors are very suspicious about me as well. All they know is I deal with Americans and they think that I am engaged in some international drugs operation.

  16. Good Comment?
    Shanon Moore

    This explains your success … people are not aware of IM
    and Indians are not terrorists…
    It was just a misconsumption…
    Did I hear you say Pakistani people are terrorists

  17. Good Comment?
    Sherwin

    Shoemoney: Affiliate drug dealer :D

  18. Good Comment?
    Trevor McNotDonald

    Haha thats great, still feel sorry for you though – you should feel privileged that you get that much attention, I bet they will stay out of your way anyway.

  19. Good Comment?
    Funny t-shirts

    Send them a Shoemoney t shirt in the mail! …it would be funny if you saw them wearing it around the neighborhood.

  20. Good Comment?
    Not a Square

    This is a great example of people who complain about stereotypes using them themselves. It’s almost like reverse discrimination. Maybe if they would take the time to talk to you or visit they would not spread the rumors any longer and maybe gain a new friend in the process.

  21. Good Comment?
    Click Input

    I would be pissed off if I found out my neighbors thought that and were gossiping it around to others. Are you going to confront them over it or what?

  22. Good Comment?
    Mark Hankins

    Start a rumor that the Indian neighbors run convenience stores…

  23. Good Comment?
    Kiley

    Wait, wait, I got it!
    Add a big ignorant bench press set to the mix, and plop it right in your front yard.

  24. Good Comment?
    Gecko Tales

    Uhh, I hate that my comment was lost because it was the best comment I’ve ever left. It was award winning, world changing, thought provoking, but now it’s lost in Internet space forever…

  25. Good Comment?
    Sami

    rough

  26. Good Comment?
    TeeCeo

    “what you talked bout willis” try being a BLACKMAN (yes I am) and working from home, without a hummer and all that I STILL get crazy looks and I know for a fact that my neighbours think I am up to no good just becouse I am home so much and don’t seem to have a job.

  27. Good Comment?
    Munch

    I will suggest you stop sticking to learn the affiliate game, and instead go out and make some affiliate money.

    It is not so much about learning. It’s about doing.

  28. Good Comment?
    SELaplana

    Question: So why does a white guy with a black h2 with nice wheels have to be a drug dealer?
    Answer: With your skinned head and thick glasses… really you look like a drug dealer. :-)

  29. Good Comment?
    Random Good Stuff

    We are 2 guys living in a huge house in a small town (1200 people with 5 pubs) … same thing here, they are never seeing us leaving the house. I don’t even know what the town thinks of us … especially if they see us out in town we are always having our French Bulldog with us (which only exits in each county maybe one ..if!) Lol.

  30. Good Comment?
    CatherineL

    Shoe – I know the feeling. Neighbours usually gossip either because they lead sad boring lives, or because they’re jealous of you. I was v upset when I found out my neighbour had been gossiping about me.

    I don’t know if this will work for you, but it worked for me. I created two free blogspots – one for the local area I live in, and one for my neighbour. Then I linked the local area one to the one for my neighbour – which contained an open letter telling her what a malicious gossip she was etc etc.

    And just to make sure she could find herself easily enough on Google, I also added some of innocent links from a couple of other websites.

    Lastly, I submitted the post on the open letter to Digg.

    Within a couple of days she was at the top of Google and anyone who looked up info on our local area could easily find her.

    If this seems a little childish – you’re right it is. But, she upset me big time – and the good news is, it stopped her speaking about me, or to me again.

    I don’t know how well this will work for your neighbours. Maybe others will have better suggestions.

  31. Good Comment?
    Eric

    Umm, have you heard of Google? If so, do a search for “hindu terrorism” It won’t take you long. For kicks, look up information about the Kashmir region.

    Just about every religion or ideology has its terrorists. They may not walk into nightclubs with suicide vests or commandeer planes, but it doesn’t take that to be a terrorist. If you want me to send you links, I’ll use Google for you.

  32. Good Comment?
    workingcanuck

    Funniest post I read in the longest time. I knew that check was a cover-up! Watch out for those whrilly birds overhead.

  33. Good Comment?
    jim

    Honestly, it’s because people love gossip and saying you’re a drug dealer is infinitely more entertaining than the truth, wouldn’t you say?

  34. Good Comment?
    Robert MacEwan

    Never say otherwise and the neighborhood kids will never ride through your lawn.

  35. Good Comment?
    WebProfessor

    yes Gopi there are plenty of terrorist organizations in America.

  36. Good Comment?
    Travel Notebook

    Dude you posted the same fucking comment 5-6 times already

  37. Good Comment?
    Ken

    Sometimes I have to wonder what the neighbors think about me, when I do bother to leave the house, I always get such strange looks…

  38. Good Comment?
    Jimmy Daniels

    Well obviously they have never done any drugs because drug dealers have customers rolling into the crib all the time, they don’t travel, lol.

  39. Good Comment?
    Gopi

    Webprofessor, so if race riots are terrorist acts then whites/blacks in LA/Detroit are terrorists too!.

  40. Good Comment?
    Lee

    Wow… just wow.

    On the upside this is the perfect opportunity to pull some pranks on these muppets. Start dressing in sports jerseys and deck yourself out in bling. Post videos of their reactions, it’s perfect link bait, haha.

  41. Good Comment?
    J.D.

    Admit it man.

    You’re a drug dealer.

    I’ll take 5 aspirin please.

  42. Good Comment?
    John

    So…
    your saying
    I can’t get a bag then…

  43. Good Comment?
    morgan thomas

    Umm dude you said you were into arbitrage, what do you think selling drugs is lol.

  44. Good Comment?
    WebProfessor

    I’m sorry my mistake. I didn’t realize the news about Hindu and Muslim violence on one another was fabricated.

  45. Good Comment?
    Vijay Teach Me

    Shoe it is the head, your shiny bald head…. lol… in Indian movies all the bad guys are bald hhaa :lol: , negihbours watching too many movies…. :twisted:

    Vijay

  46. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    Nah man shoe and I already discussed that..I told him you all would hate me…WA WA..LOL. I had a problem with my name and it kept going in the spam..I resubmitted comments and shoe let all of the comments go. I didn’t do it on purpose

  47. Good Comment?
    Gopi

    Webprofessor, my comment was clearly about indian hindus and there is not one single hindu terrorist act is a fact. Infact hindus are the victims of terrorism just like americans or for the matter israleis… i dont understand whats laughable about it!.

  48. Good Comment?
    James

    ~ How much for an 1/8th!? LOL

  49. Good Comment?
    Tye

    With his new found neighborhood status – I’ve heard Shoe is going to change it to “Pills to pay the bills”

  50. Good Comment?
    WebProfessor

    Simply because the assertion that “there is not even one single example of a hindu terrorist act” is laughable.

  51. Good Comment?
    Kiley

    And the award for Blog Post of the Year goes to;

    Shoemoney! For; “I’m a drug dealer EH”

  52. Good Comment?
    Kiley

    Corey,

    Dude, you had me rollin’ with that one.

  53. Good Comment?
    Theo

    I would move to a nicer neighborhood..

    Btw, I think Seo Guru is applying for a textlink

  54. Good Comment?
    Scott

    Funny… I always wonder what people are doing when they stay at home all day with no visible means of support. Look how many people are running around during business hours in the mall, on the roads, etc. I’ve always wanted to stop them and ask. “What do you do for a living?”

  55. Good Comment?
    bluesku

    why is that funny?

  56. Good Comment?
    Sami

    I agree with is comment. Just imagine, you think your neighbour to be a dangerous person, wouldn’t you want warn your friends to stay clear?

    Anyways, what this particular neighbour did was not confirm whether he is a drug dealer or not, and that was mistake on their part.

    If I get accused of something, I will go and find out why, and correct their assumptions. Because in the end no one wants to have bad blood with their neighbours. Be the good guy. That’s all it takes

  57. Good Comment?
    Sami

    man, Grow Up

  58. Good Comment?
    Paul.

    Just talk to them about what you do. I always get it pretty heavy from parents when I am dating a girl. “So, how do you afford all this stuff?”

  59. Good Comment?
    Rabs

    I rarely comment but this is so hilarious! I find it especially funny because I’m originally from the Indian subcon myself and can totally imagine your neighbors freaking out because you don’t go to work and appear super rich! I guess most of us are of the work hard 9-5 mentality and its hard for some people to even imagine a life beyond that.

  60. Good Comment?
    Matt Huggins

    I knew it…

  61. Good Comment?
    WebProfessor

    tell that to the Muslims in India.. lol..

  62. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    Yeh shoe play it off Like your some kind of Unabomber/terrorist…I’m sure they shut their damn mouths.

  63. Good Comment?
    ShoeMoney

    btw I also know not all white people are terrorists

  64. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    Freaking hilarious Indian terrorists. LOL!!

  65. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    Freaking hilarious, Indian terrorists. LOL!

  66. Good Comment?
    Gopi

    >>I know Indians and I know not all are terrorists

    Most Indians (>80%) are Hindus and there is not even one single example of a hindu terrorist act..I think you are confusing india for some middle eastern country!.

  67. Good Comment?
    Travel Notebook

    Also, you should somehow let it get back to them that you are not a drug dealer but you are a hitman. That should shut them up pretty fast!

  68. Good Comment?
    Travel Notebook

    You look like a thug shoe! How did you hear about this rumor anyways?

  69. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    UPS and Fedex are always at my house and I know my neighbors are thinking something because I bought a spanking new 35k suv and living it up and their hating.

  70. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    I believe he resides in Nebraska

  71. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    No I believe he resides in Nebraska

  72. Good Comment?
    king jacob

    giving the rapper that started that shizzle is still on the top of my to-do

  73. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    No I believe he lives in Nebraska

  74. Good Comment?
    Derek

    I forgot to mention, not that the post itself is THE best I’ve read on here yet (though it’s up there), the comments probably are. ROFL

  75. Good Comment?
    quadszilla

    Skillzles to pay the Billzles.

    Cokemoney.

  76. Good Comment?
    Derek

    Get a big flashing billboard with the Shoemoney logo with big-ass disco light letters that say something like King of the Internet Marketers and plunk it on your front lawn for a few months until they get the idea. You can afford the electric bill for a couple million watts of bulbs for a few months I think ;) Think Vegas strip.

    (Oh, don’t forget to aim the sign towards the front of their house, preferably that it lights up their bedrooms at night.)

  77. Good Comment?
    Affiliate Noob

    Well that explains it! All this time I’ve been trying to learn how to make money on the web and I could have saved myself the hassle and been a drug dealer. Oh well, live and learn. ;)

    I think I’ll stick to trying to learn the affiliate game – no bullets and if you do it right you still get the chicks and the ummm, Hummer.

  78. Good Comment?
    Joeychgo

    set up a webcam watching their house – broadcast it and promote the site. :) See what you can catch them doing!
    BTW – how much for an eightball? ROFL!

  79. Good Comment?
    papaman

    this is so funny man! LOL

    btw can I buy some? I’m from Greece :)

  80. Good Comment?
    The SEO Millionaire

    oh man shoe! this is the funniest thing i’ve read all week.

  81. Good Comment?
    Modern Worker

    Haters man, haters.

    As they say… “those with small minds talk about people and those with great minds talk about ideas!”

  82. Good Comment?
    cooliojones

    I agree. Shoe shouldn’t have to prove himself, his neighbors should. They should ask him what he does if they are so curious. This is how beef between people begins, through unfounded speculation with no attempt for clarification.

  83. Good Comment?
    Seo Guru

    My neighbors think the same thing about me because I’m rolling in a brand new 35K SUV, steady UPS, FEDEx etc coming constantly…I think it is hilarious because they really have no idea.

  84. Good Comment?
    CPA Affiliates

    *LOL* many people dont believe i make aliving on the net and think i work for the mafia some how… for me working for the mafia would be too much work :)

  85. Good Comment?
    SEO Guru

    You know shoe some people will never realize that you can actually make a living from home because most folks are stuck with the 9-5 and their happy with that.

    My neighbors think the same thing about me because I went out and bought a brand new 07 trailblazer…not a hummer but it was still 35k and I have steady packages everyday from ups, fedex etc…It’s quite funny because they really have no idea…

  86. Good Comment?
    PrintnPost

    LOL…this is great! Now you have some street Rep to go with your CD! One of these days you should fill a couple zip lock bags with that powered sugar for funnel cakes and leave it on top of your hood for a day…that would make interesting blog.

  87. Good Comment?
    Hawaii SEO

    You should tell them that you are a Pimp, NOT a drug dealer.

  88. Good Comment?
    SEO Guru

    Shoe my neighbors think the same thing. I think they just need to mind their business. It’s funny though, they see packages rolling in almost every day and they just snoop around and look out their windows….funny!

  89. Good Comment?
    SEO Guru

    You know what shoe my neighbors think the same thing about me. But I just think they just need to mind their own business. I’m like you if I see something I want I buy it.

  90. Good Comment?
    Mike

    Some people have told me they have a ring tone nuying addiction. So maybe your neighbors are right. I mean you do fit the MO perfectly :)

  91. Good Comment?
    Adam Maywald

    That’s funny. I’ve heard a few other people have the same complaint down here in LA. Since they live in a nice house, nice car and work from home all day – their are no other occupations that kind of person can have except being a drug lord. Good times.

  92. Good Comment?
    Paul.

    I’ve been labeled a drug dealer before. Just because you don’t have a 9-5 it automaticly makes people suspicious. I’d just catch them some day and talk to them about it.

  93. Good Comment?
    Todd

    Haha, that’s a great story being a drug dealer!!! All those packages is your drug shippments for the week.

    Great Post!

    Todd
    nicetrydumbass.com

  94. Good Comment?
    corey

    “Why don’t you just walk up to their door and introduce yourself and say I’m not a drug dealer”

    because that’s bullshit. his neighbors should retract their gossip and apologize for starting rumors about people they don’t know.

  95. Good Comment?
    Austin Overton

    Confront them… Tell them exactly what you told us. That just because their Indian and have prayer meetings does not mean you think their terrorists. This actually really upsets me, that could be ruining you rep and you could have feds knockin on your door soon because a stupid rumor.

  96. Good Comment?
    2k a day

    Yes that sounds right, all drug dealers get their drugs to sell by UPS! Honestly.

  97. Good Comment?
    WebProfessor

    Your the Biggie Smalls of search

  98. Good Comment?
    Ali

    Let me guess these Indians are Muslims, and they hold prayer meetings.

    Why don’t you just walk up to their door and introduce yourself and say I’m not a drug dealer, they might just invite you in for a cup o’tea. A few bad apples here and there, but hey like you said we’re not all crazy.

  99. Good Comment?
    Brant

    Were you on the RottenNeighbor.com website? I actually saw a post in the Los Angeles area about a drug dealer guy with a H2. I don’t know if you are in LA though.

  100. Good Comment?
    sundaybrew

    My neighbors think the same thing , sometimes,

    well they did until I told them, I never leave that much either,

    But also , Shoe,

    Did you hear I was getting a Shoemoney.com Tattoo?

  101. Good Comment?
    corey

    i love fucking with clueless neighbors. once it’s obvious that people are just being ignorant and nosey, i take it to the limit for maximum hilarity.

    1. start shooting dice in your driveway with dillsmack. make sure you say “throw dem bones!” loudly and often.

    2. affix the johnny chimpo logo to all outgoing packages.

  102. Good Comment?
    Brant

    Did you neighbors post about you here?

    http://www.rottenneighbor.com/counties/los-angeles.php

    I actually found a post about a guy with a black hummer being a drug dealer, but I don’t know if you are from Los Angeles.

  103. Good Comment?
    RobMalon

    Well I posted before but I’ll do it again ;)

    The main point I had was you’re a marketer….Their persona is general warm/friendly…so you can sell stuff easily. I have a hard time believing you could come off shady to anyone with that kind of background as a job. Go figure.

  104. Good Comment?
    freezer003

    Yo Shoe.. why you’ve changed yours motto from “Skills to pay the bills” (wich I’ve very liked) to “I see Rich People” ?

  105. Good Comment?
    freezer003

    Drug Dealer ;) quite a funny thing ;) I’ve got pretty the same problem with my nighbors.

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